It’s taken be a bit of time to get all of this put into words. Here it is though…
It was July 2013. That was the first time I met Phyllis and Clark. I never thought that two years later, after meditating with them for the first time, I would have to come to terms with never seeing Clark again on this Earth. He passed away late last night. SO, it is with a very heavy heart that I sit down to share the news of the passing of my good friend, Clark Webb.
Some of the first words Clark ever said to me, outside of his customary warm greetings, were “Baba Nam Kevalam.” The mantra “Baba Nam Kevalam” is Sanskrit. One interpretation of it, the one that Clark shared with us on my first day of meditation, was “love is all there is.” Another interpretation of it is that “love is everywhere.” The silver lining to Clark leaving us on this Earth, is that maybe now we will stop being selfish and hogging all of his light for our benefit. Now, I guarantee you, his love absolutely, definitely is everywhere, just as Baba Nam Kevlar notes.
This meditation class I mentioned was kind of spear-headed by my good friends Shane M., Michael R., and Brandon C. Clark’s partner, Phyllis A., always joined us for an hour on each Sunday to get together and just be present and mindful with one another. Over the two years I got to know him and his wonderful partner Phyllis, I had many great conversations with Clark. He was a father-figure in my life. That first summer, I’d come for meditation almost every weekend, and many times throughout the school year. No matter where Saturday night may have taken me, that was where I wanted to spend my Sunday morning – at Akke’s Yoga Place in Blacksburg, Virginia, down on the floor with Clark, our friends, and our yoga mats. The amount of community that I’d feel in that place was unreal. Even as the stressors of graduate school were beating down on many of us, that was a great time to just leave your cell phone behind and be PRESENT.
On many days, after meditation, we would head over to a local sushi restaurant named Green’s to continue our fellowship. It was one of those lunches where Clark shared a very popular quote with me. I had heard it before, but coming from Clark, it was particularly influential, especially as I wrapped up graduate school. A lot of Clark’s wisdom helped give me context for what I was going through. It’s the same quote that you’d find on Clark’s e-mail signature, I noticed once (because I think he only ever e-mailed, exactly, once. haha). Originally conceived by Harold Whitman, it says,
“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
Looking back, that was a defining quote for me. Being reminded of such an important notion influence my following what makes me come alive in a very deliberate way in my adult life – I’m about a year into doing exactly that (hint: you’re reading it).
No, I don’t meditate everyday, but instead of being moving and your brain creating, you’re doing the antithesis: your’e being present and still. I love Clark and Phyllis for introducing me to that. It legitimately changed my life. Yes, I’m still very Type-A and go go go, and “if I’m not busy then I’m bored” is something you’ll hear me say often, BUT…BUT, Phyllis and Clark helped me be okay with NOT having to be that all of the time. Now, every time I practice meditation, I think of them. I will think of them even more deeply now that I know that Clark is no longer here with us.
In our community, and quite frankly around the world, Clark was known for leading service-learning trips, particularly to Nicaragua. Clark lived a full, full life from what I know of it. We had a few nights at the Cellar, many Sunday mornings at meditation, and other interactions where he shared with me absolutely vivid stories of his past. He was so intentional and had purpose on his brain all the time. The notion of “helping one new person every single day” that I try to embody is something that Clark loved and also embodied himself, in many ways. He was involved in. His influence was felt by many, local students, Tech students, community members, and the like. He was an admirable man for how often he gave of his time and his love to other people. He loved traveling and he was one of the most authentic, kind people I’ve ever known. I’ll never forget hearing the stories that he shared of a race-divided Tennessee where he worked as a younger adult during the Civil Rights movement. I love Clark and Phyllis so much that they were one of my main spots during my graduation weekend as I showed my parents around town. I took them to visit each other at Clark and Phyllis’ home when my parents were in town for graduation weekend. I just loved, loved, loved hearing the stories they had to share with each other.
When I was asked by Blacksburg Senior High School’s Class of 2014 seniors to be their commencement speaker, I was flattered. When I shared the news with Phyllis and Clark, they were ecstatic. And they vowed to be there. And they were there. They were SO there. They were two of a small few of people to come support a very nervous me at one of the most important, in my opinion, speaking engagements I’ve ever had. And they even gave me this wonderful, wonderful gift: an article written by my friend Danielle B., reflecting on my time as both an undergraduate and graduate student in the Blacksburg community and at Virginia Tech. In a gorgeous frame, it is now leaning against a wall in my condo in Northern Virginia, as I continue the moving process that I started in…February! haha
I will never forget the memories I shared with Clark while he was here. I will never, ever forget such a great man. I’m so grateful, even in his passing, that Clark knew and knows how much I valued and appreciated him. I always remind my loved ones to never leave an interaction angry, to not say things you don’t mean, and don’t purposefully lose an opportunity to tell your loved ones how much you love them and/or how much they mean to you, because you legitimately never know if that will be the last time you see them.
Phyllis told Clark’s daughter, “We are not in control. Just trust the spirit.” A motto I’ve lived my life by for a long, long time. And I’m sure Clark would agree, himself. And on that note – you know, I don’t really believe in the idea of “rest in peace” for Clark. Why? Because he was way too passionate a man to be resting, wherever he may be now. Way to passionate, way too interested in social justice, and way too ready-to-be-an-activist-for-an-important cause. That’s one of the most memorable things about you, my friend: your passion.
I didn’t think the last time I saw Clark would be the last time that I saw him. However, I will be so deeply inspired, for the rest of my life, becuase of the two years that I got to spend with him.
